HAVING OWN VALUES

We set our mind up to some standard and we think every one should follow those thing which is ofcourse impossible . I would rather put my things this way one should have his/her own standards pertaining to their own life .One should not think that everyone arround should follow those .

I have seen one person he has his own values he says he would want his life like this an he says iam ready to phase difficulties i donot know whether to say he has his own way of life but one thing is for sure one should not impose things on some one else .

We can not blame anyone they have their own ways of living life nothing can stop an individual from doing so. At times we might be wrong in our way of thinking but ultimately one thing will happen what GOD wants .

I did not get one thing these days having our own values is fine but many of us has changed our mindset we have moulded ourattitude because of some reason we have our own reasons for everything .Today X does a mistake he has a reason he/ she does not want to do anything wrong it might be correct in his thought but it might not be in your so thats how it works .

DO NOT BLAME ANY ONE FOR ANYTHING BLAME YOURSELF FOR EVERYTHING

MISTAKES

What are mistakes? We think something and we set our own standards and we assume a thing if they go little here and there we think it is mistake.

One thing what ever i think might be correct in my own way but might look little awkward for the person next to me who knows me (I mean he is very close friend in spite of that).

So here mistake has our own meaning and our own definitions .One wants to do this other wants to do that finally only one thing will happen what GOD wants.

We are all human beings we do mistakes but we have to remember ultimately we will be judged by out heavenly father who has given us life freedom everything .In scriptures it is written if you measure a person with a scale you please do not forget you will also be measured in the same way (these are not the exact words) .When ever i do something abnormal i also feel the same.
Small things sometimes irritate me .I am with lots of temper and i react fast to things .I think a lot these are negatives of me.

Last but not the least don’t be judgmental this is for me also ......

MERRY CHRISTMAS

WHAT AM I
We meet many people in life some leaves mark in life which we can not forget in life time . There are many people who gave us so much of love which was precious than diamond.

Did we ever think anytime that can we borrow or buy from somewhere the unconditional love and caring that we got from people?

We forget many a times how caring and loving our parents were when we have bitter things , we always think people do mistakes no one is perfect all such did we ever think why can’t we do something for them in return . They have always given us they never expected anything from us .Likewise friends have also done so much .I always given more importance to both in life after GOD family and after them my friends who never ever expected anything from me .

I have very few friends who are no comparison to anyone they are like my own we were not born together but we met in life it is my accident for me but i always felt it is God’s will that i had to meet these people . No one is perfect in all the ways we learn from our mistakes. Time is the best teacher we might not speak to all properly some people just love you seeing some quality in you we might not have done anything for them but still they love you for what ever little you have done .

If i see behind i have more hatredness for many people but till today they love me. There was a person who just cried for me there are many people who miss me today I am really thankful to GOD for giving me such wonderful people . This is too late to repent for what ever had happens that’s history for me but not for them. I have even stopped speaking to them for my own reasons but still they love me. I analyze myself why I am like this what ego problems I have why I am not good to all. I tell myself all the time that I am bad but i never took initiative to change or correct what is wrong with in me which is making me stand in such position today. I pray for them that’s all I might not see them anymore in life but wants them to be happy all the time. I will get punishment from GOD for all these .......Pray for me

BEING ALONE
We came in to this alone but we Indians we are emotional we have our own values in life we stick to our own things . If we analyze we are psychologically balanced we don’t have many problems are people in west have got. So it is one way very helpful that we grow we stand we try analyzing things. But we are very emotionally attached to families and friends.

I was just thinking about myself when i had a friend i used to think i have some one with me when the day came she was leaving me i cried a lot but thank GOD i was with family that time i mean i was not alone . When i came back to this place first day all alone in the room whenever i saw her bed it had recollected me the memories we had shared with her....

I used to think being alone is not that difficult. Believe me it is very difficult we need people. After experiencing this i have decided one should have a partner in life all the time it is not a thing that you got to work for him and his family it is just that he is for you and you are for her. This place made me realize the fact that one can not live all alone even if he / she has job money and all facilities .I join my hands to pray for all those who are all alone leaving their family friends back in India . It is very difficult to be alone but one thing GOD ALMIGHTY is always with us (I am not contradicting) but still be strong come back enjoy in our country with our people it is nice to be with our own people in our land........

MISSING ......

we miss something which we really worth attending we feel bad but we can not go back to that day and enjoy that day we tell our heart and mind that it is all done nothing to do now and we will think and feel bad about it for a while and days pass away ...

There were many incidences where we missed because we did not wanted and there are some where we badly wanted but because of many reasons we could not make it final result of all these is we missed nothing could be done . There are things like time which we can not get back anytime you pay cores but that time will not come back so utilize the time that GOD has given you to the fullest extent so that you need not repent anytime but even if we sit back and think about it we will not get anything and we can not even do anything ..

Days pass away we meet many people as days pass and we make adjustments accordingly but nothing stops for us nothing which is materialistic or immaterialistic stops for us .. Example age never stops till we finish something we have to do things in life time and right place ...

I'm sure we all have our own ideas, along with our own goals and achievements of how we perceive life as a whole. Were we put here merely to make money, i.e. attend school so we may be educated enough to find a job that we may keep until we retire. Or were we put here to look after our fellow collegues. Maybe we were put on this Earth to try and achieve the best we can. Maybe both of these together. Each and everyone of us has their own opinion.

I believe that life is a tough obstacle in itself. I also believe that we were put here to survive and do as best we can through all of life's troubles that are thrown at us and also to enjoy the good times that come, take nothing for granted and appreciate life itself!

Because everyone is different and have different opinions, as i have mentioned in many times we all have our own way of analysing things and reacting to it i hope it could be of some use and you are all most welcome to write your opinions on this ......

Life is like a gardenAnd friendship like a flower,That blooms and grows in beautyWith the sunshine and the shower.

And lovely are the blossomsThat are tended with great care,By those who work unselfishlyTo make the place more fair.

And, like the garden blossoms,Friendship's flower grows more sweetWhen watched and tended carefullyBy those we know and meet.

And, if the seed of friendshipIs planted deep and trueAnd watched with understanding,Friendship's flower will bloom for you.

Thanks For Being My Friend!

I DO NOT LIKE ............................

To day I thought I should write about my dearest friend who is a special person for me now . She is very easy going and will not take things as easy but still has some space for principles too ....

She knows every moment of my life what am I doing where am i going wrong everything in fact I should say for the past six-seven months I am totally under control many a times because of her she shows graph many a times in a day my mood swings . I normally go uncontrollable many a times that time zig it is up comes down many a times when I am sad do not want to talk to anyone .....

we came together to work we are staying in the same place sharing same room sharing sweet and bitter moments together...Had not realized anytime that i need to leave her so early time has come to leave and say bye to her she won't be there physically anymore with me working here .

we walked together spend many a times fighting for small things spent time laughing loud spent time singing when the light goes off that’s the best time . We used to shout when light goes off and when i see lizard and when she comes across a cockroach sad part is lizards and cockroaches are many in our room we had over come this because when ever she saw lizard i used to run away when cockroach comes i have to dare to kill it , be it midnight of day i have to take my chappal in my hand and kill an insect . One day it happend such BAT came inside both started screaming came out of room some how managed to send the BAT out of the house .

she has principles I said na she does not like someone touching her face she does not like some one pulling her hair she does not like many things ... I told her many a times to list out what ever she does not like ... From day one I am telling her ...I troubled her a lot…

I won't say I don’t like this and that so often as she uses . But believe me she is very good at heart we both are emotional when I cry she never cries but when i see her crying i can not stop my tears . I love her very much , she is elder to me by one year but have learnt many things from her . She does not like taking help form anyone she tries her level best to do on her own I have to practice she says if I take a help I have to bow down my head and have to listen to him/her . Did many mistakes now want to correct she was telling me she used to say every time that you do conscious clearance by sharing each and every dam thing ( ha I did that but now I don’t have anyone to do that). Days are moving I pray and wish to see her happy all the time in her life ...

LANGUAGE
Now we have so many means and channels through which we can learn a language. The base for learning any language is to make the whole process of communication much easier. But language is one channel to make communication easier just by knowing a language we can not successfully communicate.

When we go past people used to communicate through signals and through shouting .Every living being communicates.

When the kid starts speaking in mom's lap he tries making moo moo.. Sounds. He is a perfect observer he observes and patiently listens to mom and others what ever they are saying .The kid is comfortable only with mom some are very friendly from childhood they go to everyone. When they are uncomfortable they cry and that’s the signal for mom that he needs something ... What happens when a child is born we give extra care we know that he can not communicate what he wants so we help him/her till they grow up and can speak normally.

How important is communication we have to understand if I know something and can not explain the other person and the whole process of communication has broken because of me .I am barrier there. we must have heard many a times what’s is communication we have to make the other person understand through what ever way possible use all your skills and make the other person understand .

Here I would add my own example when i was given a group for training .First thing is i do not know the language they can understand and they can not understand the languages I can speak. These are low level employee in the organization. I had a fear can i make them understand then i sat down to think what can i do took help of their supervisors to translate the response was too good felt happy then asked another person to make certain points in their language and give them to learn the same it really worked wonders they could understand it much much much better than anyone today I am happy because of them i have started learning a new language in my life.

That’s the thing we all learn languages to communicate one thing knowing correct way means grammatically correct way and correct slang is very important. Trying level best to learn things hope I will succeed. I felt learning a language is very important and the most important thing is ways and means of communication if you can not speak then find out ways how we can make the other person . I am sure all of us must have had an experience when we go to different places must have phased problems to make people understand but we should all thank foreigners for giving common language English which we are using now ....

WHY DO WE GET HURT ...??????? HOW DO WE OVER COME A DIFFICULTY..??????
Had seen a w0nderful title today did not knew the meaning of the word found through the support of MS -WORD thesaurus. The word is unscathed meaning of it is unhurt, un harmed ,untouched .
We have different interests in life we are all passionate of some thing , want to do this that according to our likes and dislikes...

when do we get hurt we all must have hurt in life some time or the other when we get hurt we show in different forms some cry loud . some sit calm and think or just be alone .. we have different ways to react to situations

EVERY ACTION HAS IT'S OWN EQUAL AND OPPOSITE REACTION -" Newt0n's Findings "

In this as i said we react to the situation some shows it some might not ... In this topic for discussion is why do we get hurt ........
we have 6 words here to find out a correct answer :
why ,who, what, when ,where , how.

I have used the first one to find out " why do we get hurt "

WHY??????????????????????????????????????????????????????

we have our own reasons to analyze things a hurt for XYZ will not be same for ABC it might not be the same because his way of thinking and his way of seeing things differ from XYZ. That’s the reason why we call "Individual "we are not alike in anyway.....

If we see psychology place a very important role in every one’s attitude, passion and likes dislikes ,thinking process, analysis ,and etc...

This has some implications we hate certain things which we have seen in life suppose in small age we saw a scary thing or mom or grand mom has taught us that cockroach is scary that is developed by mom and grand mom , but it lasts till that boy ends life he will be scared some tries to avoid and some tries over coming this difficulties by catching it nothing will happened ...

But many of us till today have some fear . We believe in some higher power that leads us in life . But when we get hurt there will be some reason behind that . When we try to find out why we got hurt we think about the whole thing and we will also find solutions to it why we are hurt . but one thing i found is we all have reasons but we don’t find out solutions to overcome difficulties when we are hurt we know the cause we must have done somewhere some at least 1% of mistake some times the mistake totally lies on other person / on us also ..

I would only say we should analyze first of all if we are wrong in any circumstance we are emotional emotions ruin us many times but still if we start knowing and seeing what’s wrong where the fault lies I am sure we would be great one day .......

LET’S PUT IN TO PRACTISE INSTEAD OF DISCUSSING......

IT IS BEST NOT TO PUT TOO MANY QUESTIONS

We do not like some one questioning us for each and everything in our life. When were small we did not realize but when we were in mom's lap she used to question us why you are doing this and that knowingly she did that she knows that we can not answer her but still she kept questioning us ...

So this Q&A session has a long history one thing is good when we question we get not only answers we make the other person think . When I was in college i used to ask too many questions and when my lecturer just ignores I used to go out and ask him the same and one day I have realized he doesn’t like some one questioning ,but I thought he is not confident enough and not only me many had that in their minds . I feel he just comes to teach a lesson will not even ask do you have doubts ,because he is not confident enough to teach at all .I pity him for that...

when I came to PG level again my Principal used to look at us in weekly forums ... he thinks if we have understood we should have doubts .It is not that if we do not understand also just for the sake of asking we can ask .One thing we never used to give attention we used to have our own busy life .But I have left questioning in my degree courtesy my lecturer .... Now again to resume it was pretty difficult .But one person was there always to rescue he was my classmate he used to have loads questions and he used to note down in a small slip paper where no one could understand what it is all about, even I tried one day i took his slip after a session and all though my way to bus stop I was just going through that slip where i missed city bus. Of course many a times he asks all foolish just for the sake of asking he used to do that ......Many a times I kept quite because asking a great professor or pointing out at him is bad again courtesy my lecturer in degree ...

Some are afraid of questioning because they will be questioned again some attempt to answer some takes offensive way some takes it as a challenge some will be very frank they will tell I am not sure about this and will let you know .. I feel all these are the barriers for a person ....
Let us tell the world in professional and in personal life we have many questions unanswered because of many reasons. One thing I said it is best not to put too many questions when questions are unanswered we get disappointed in life so just to over come this .I said with my experience but please do not really stop questioning as I always believe a situation has positive and negative effects so seeing positive side lets move ........

Hope today you will not be questioned by anyone ...........
If your boss questions why is it so we get wild no ... we forget one thing that his higher official asks him the same so he is getting a view from his subordinate .Try to give him your view he will not openly say that but keep that in your mind that we are answering a higher official in answering our own boss ....(this is professional life)

“His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness through our knowledge of him who called us by his own glory and goodness.” (2 Peter 1:3) The Big Idea: This study helps students discover the principles of spiritual growth and commit themselves to utilize the resources that God has provided for their growth. Growth happens when we diligently respond to God’s grace. At the conclusion of this we will be able to: State and explain the eight principles of growth; Identify the pattern of growth in their own lives; Plan a growth strategy for their own lives. Spirituality is something which gives us immense power and confidence from with in that some one powerful is with you where ever and whatever situation you are in but the Almighty is with you and you feel him with in you.

HOW IMPORTANT LEADING MEANINGFUL LIFE IS?????????????

I have seen situations we all want to live happy life. We do not want to leave our beloved very soon. We have our own way to live, we have our own goals we work hard to achieve and we take help of GOD, friends and family in many situations. But one important thing when we achieve our goals we forget everyone who is behind our success. Just by giving sweets or telling many we are doing nothing but we need to remember this or life time .If we forget there is no meaning.

Coming to life what’s meaningful life is? We have our own formulae for explaing this life .But one we all know life is not simple we also know the facts that we donot know how long we have this with us .We never know when we take last breath. Is life only living on earth?

Here I would like to ask another question. Do you believe in eternal life .There is life after death also which is going to be much much much happier than all these. If we believe in that lets march towards our goals we have long way to go to achieve and prove.

We all love our lives and we want our friends and loved one's to be with us all the time. When things go wrong we blame GOD. let us not do that now ,we know life is not easy and nothing is our hands it is all what the creator decision .Lets try to live a meaningful life and show good to others by our living style

I know in between i went here and there but summary is with little little help what ever we do we get recognition if we all fulfill our work and try to put in our best I am sure organizations will have fruits of success .We should fear to at least one person if not GOD if not mom and dad someone we should ..... But one more thing when we are doing everything correct why do we need to fear? Where we will lead into what’s correct and wrong? no one can define everyone has their own ways to judge but one thing let us not judge another person taking you as benchmark no never do that .If we judge one today tomorrow he will also judge us basing on his own parameters ... with these have a nice day ahead. Have fun enjoy life great we are living happy life on earth we never know when we finish our journey on this earth but still hope is there so with the hope we need to move further

MY TIME WITH MY HEAVENLY FATHER

When I get out of bed we always forget to thank GOD for giving us a day to see in life. We also forget that many many have lost their lives in sleep we are one among the one chosen to see the morning . GOD has his own will against what ever he does for us he said many things. What ever he said he has fulfilled through many incidences .

I have many many incidences to share the wonderful experience of GOD .I have done many sins an I have asked GOD to forgive me and asked for salvation we all need that we can not be perfect at anytime we can be good at lest but i was not even that . I started thinking one day why GOD loves me so much .I got an answer he has brought me in to this world to prove something through me then I thought what could be that purpose i never ever thought about it . I am living my own life I have my own choices i never go to GOD except broken time and sadness when I am happy I never went to GOD .

But still he loves me so much he has given me 23 years of time he has shown me that you can be a success in life . I left all that and I am just running for worldly things no doubt we all need worldly things to live we have our own pleasures of life where we want to fulfill .

I feel will GOD be with me even though I have never cared for him my answer will be YES because he loves me and he had shed his precious blood for me and many in this world. I have asked GOD many things to day at this moment I am feeling guilty that i have never gave him i want to start giving him for one more thing I am ashamed because I was always selfish i wanted my own things . I want to ask GOD to be with me always and to be with poor and needy for their help too..

I want to share one more wonderful miracle in my life as I said I had N number of experiences one great thing I had a break for one year after my BCA and MHM that time i had gone through a bad phase I will not share that but I had come over it I don’t want to recollect all that. When that happened I thought there is no hope in life when I got a message that my name was not there in first list that was night 1:00AM I was with my mom no one was there at home I had burst out I was crying like a animal my mom did not understand what to do she told me this is not end of life but I did not start she started yelling at me thinking I will stop but she was also going through the same pain then she decided to send me to Hyderabad where I stayed in my uncles place and applied for jobs through my another uncles support I worked for few days and he was impressed with my work then suddenly one day I got to hear that I got the seat in MHM and need to get admitted wow wonderful thing mom called up I can not explain how happy i was i cried a lot thanked GOD for everything and went alone to get admission in the college no one was there people around has got their parents besides but I was alone first met my principal and went inside to a big hall where there were all arrangements made and got admitted made payments and all successfully .From that time I have seen phases of life to become successful realized life is not that easy as i was always thinking to day I am here because of my GOD and because of parents and many loved one's support I want to thank each one of them individually for helping me and my sis to come to this stage to prove what we are with this i want to take small steps in reaching where I want to I am now goal oriented i want to see myself as something I want to do something want to achieve something in life and want to show that even though money is important if one has will and support from GOD can do anything in life .

GOD bless me abundantly so that I can prove myself I want your support i need you LORD.

Change alone is eternal, perpetual, immortal

We all have mood swings the meaning of it is "................................................................................."
we have mood swings because our thinking changes .It changes for different reasons we see a great personality whom we admire all the time . Suppose we get an opportunity to meet him and talk to him or listen to him. What happens even though he is just talking it gets registered in mind we discuss we analyze what he said and try to implement if it possible.

Ha there are incidences we phase a situation and if the plan won't work out in the same way we change our mindset and want to find solutions to it and some will run away from the whole thing who are just scared and they do not want to phase the defeat .Some want to analyze why it happened such the ROOT CAUSE ANALYSIS .I feel the second thing RCA will help every individual to come out of different solutions.

One more situation we change for our loved once they want to see us like this like that we change our thinking pattern because we love them so much we want to change because they are very important for us and we want to show them something . There is always selfishness in every moment we change we change because it helps us in our future .

Today in our work setups the managers bring in change because they want profits that’s business motto .Leaving all these change has its own barriers we have studied in management and all that with experience researchers has found and writers have written basing the research and situations they have found.

Leaving all that change is good or bad .I feel change is good many a times because we learn new things we try to inculcate and with that change we have negative implications also comparatively there are many positive also .

One example if a person is a negative thinker we say he is sadist he wants to see sadness every time but we have forgot to analyze why he has become like that which situations has made him to think that ways but we are all human beings .We have our way of living life thinking, analyzing we have our own freedom basically .

Situations make us change
loved once makes us change
selfishness makes us change
our dreams and goals make us change
our working atmosphere makes us change
Living style makes us change as we reach our goals and becoming what ever we want
there are N number of reasons why we change ........

Finally last but not the least we all get more positive things in life when we change we have to encourage people to change where ever we are we have to believe that change brings in new things in life ......

what do one wants to achieve ...............

When i came to this world i wanted only mom and mom's love .when i started walking and learnt how to walkl with out mom's support i have satrted neglecting mom and i wanted to go out and play with all kids who were in play ground.

When i got promoted from primary school to secondary i wanted still play ground did not give importance to studies but used to just study because of parents fear. when i was in class seven also i was not serious that was the first time i was facing the exam where my class teacher won't evaluate but my paper goes to a teacher whom i have never seen but i got through that .I thought it was a big achievement in life i got through that exam.

Then again routine 8th and 9th again a kind of fear came to give 10th exams so from the begining in was serious but still had fear with social studies and got through in normal way first class was happy till this time was in telugu medium.

When i had a phase where i had to adjust with medium shift and co-education it was a great fear with in me but had a zoology teacher in +1 she was a great help for me .She was my teacher in college and friend when i come out of class i used to wait for her used to go to her buss stop even though it was far was very friendly she was real great help for me but suddenly she left the college but did not leave me she used to teach private tutions for me in +2 also so was not worried at all +1 was a great achievement and in that year only two got through all the papers successfully i was one in that .

When i got through +2 in that area we never think other than medical field ofcourse i was born in the hospital as everyone takes birth in the hospital i was brought up also in the campus because my mom dad used to work for mission hospital .In my family there was one already into hospital health care but did not wanted to become technician or nurse .Did not tell anyone it happend such i gave MBBS entrance test was not at all ambicious in life just gave went to university got to sit there gave exam was first exam where my mom did not pray for me and my dad was not there with me.It was in tirupathi my cousin accompanied me and gave came out and came to my cousins house everyone started asking first of all i did not study gave all guessings except zoology and botony papers but knew that i will not get seat.Then was the phase to attend BSc Nursing exam wow it was very exiting ...

BSc nursing exam again in tirupathi gave well this time mom prayed and mom accompanied me got the results in the evening poor cousinbrother got a bad news that my name was not there in first list started crying because i never expected even though i did not wanted to become a nurse i thought i will get seat and will reject it .The thinking was wrong came home sweet home where my dad had taken a big lecture did not come out of home was inside just listening to music . After a week my dad came in the afternoon with a application form . By that time i had filled so many and got so many precious words to hear form dad. He says" you do not even know how to fill a application form how will you do the course forget it join some primary school teacher course or ANM course it is again a nursing course where she is a supporting nurse will take bed pans and just give bath to patient ".

so got that filled up normally dad filles up application because he thinks i will over write on something and he needs to put whitener it is a solution used to just apply on papers where we have done some mistakes called erasex also ... so he filled posted got hall ticket as usual went to Tirupathi .Going to tirupathi was exiting get to meet cousins and wow i used to enjoy went there with a big entrance preparation book studied and wrote exam in the same university where i wrote MCET but different building mom wa there with em this time .

One day after this got call letter for the BCA first call letter wow my dad was happy chalo kuch tho hai abhi went to university auditorium in the morning my another cousin was asst professor in the same university he was really worried anyways he said our turn came and there is one college in Tirupathi where there are some seats and it is AP Residential college anyways i had no clue what was it all about got admitted .

Now got in to hostel life it was horrible one bath room and 12 girls . managed some how mom had bought matters and pillow set my room inside and she left me there .Did not knew how to lead life i donot know how to wash cloths mom said she will come and take home wash and get it back anyways used to wait for mom to come .The most important thing is i can not eat food if it is not cooked in proper way as my mom cooks so weeks i did not eat anything and one day i saw my cousins friend in my principals room i had just stood in front of him cried a lot my principal saw that came to him .

principal: sir do you know this girl oh GOD she is not eating anything she does not talk to anyone had lots of complaints she waits for her mothers call .if she continues like this we have to see her dead body one day

Brothers cousin: no no sir she is the yonger one and he tried his level best to convince that principal .


I was badly hurt told my brother to ask my cousin to call they have decided not to call one sunday morning i was just sitting inside i could hear somebody shouting my name for the first time and just opend my room doors wow a great gift my mom and sis cried a lot my sis also she went to my cousins home and cried a lot they were not ready to keep me because there was no lady in that house anyways they had there own reasons then suddenly i got an opportunity to stay there my loving sis came from bangalore serched a job for me both satyed and finished BCA .

After BCA i had to do masters but gave again the entrace got seat in JNTU university did not wanted to join there because i wanted in Tirupathi .Then had a time to spend with small kids in a big english medium school as computer teacher but worst part is wearing sary which i never wore in my life left that joined another small school which was away from my place but small village .Had a wonderful chidren in both the schools they used to love me so much till today they come my home to wish me on christmas and new year . I had lovely time there were times i used to go away from kids in church they used to wish me good morning miss oh GOD but they love me so much .One year was that then later my sis got an applicaton this time for MHM course in Apollo Hospitals Jubileehills .Wrote exam and got in to it finished course and had a lovely time with sis even she was doing her masters in her own field so we were together and on 11th sept was the painful time to leave my family sis for the first time and went to capital city of India delhi.

Delhi first few days stayed in guest house and later shifted to a flat which was given by hospital .on the second day we met our GM operations and he said we want two girls to go to medical superintendent office to work for doccumentation in four me and another girl was selected and went to work with MS thenone day as i was working and preparing ISO and JCIA doccuments i met a guy was smart and had a crush it went on six months my departmental shift was there but my eyes were always on the guy who was in that hospital but after six months the time started to search a job met a Directir Medical Services who was my guide when i was in hyderabad for my dissertation he said i need you people in Dhaka apollo thats how iam here to day it's been six months since i left India i came here on 28th may 2005 and rest i will explain later my experience in Bangladesh .....

continue .....

TURNING POINT OF LIFE ............

There were sleepless nights and there were times where i had phased rejection as usual in life cried a lot cried to GOD for help but no one came to help .Thought no one will come but i knew that i have to come out of the whole situation because i had created a situation like that and i had cried a lot and finally thought practically.

with the situation emmotional decisions come and thought a lot which i never ever thought my goals went aside for a person whom i have never seen never met .

I donot want to blame anyone for this . I blame myself for making myself stand in such situations there had been many situations like . But I still have hope in life that I will get a best Guy with whom i will lead my rest of life .

With this situation i had come accross situations where i realized that iam weak at heart and i have realized one more thing that life is not just having a man besides me. Life is different entirely . I want to lead a new life and a life which makes my family and friends feel proud of me . I am very happy and iam sure with this i will never ever do the same mistake again in future .

As people always say it is true that we learn from our mistakes we have to control our emmotions which is very true we can control our emmotions there is nothing we can not control .Everything is in our hands .

To day iam very happy want to thank two people in life who are responsible and who hold a important role in this situation one is my friend and one is the guy for walking in to my life an walking out of my life very soon by showing the practical life to me .

Iam very thankful to that guy.In this era where guys use girls there are people who are true to girls. Iam very fortunate to meet guy like that who wants to achieve something in life and he has made me realize something in life and he will have a great future always ahead .

one more thing GOD is there to send right person. I have my own goals and dreams in life i pleeds you all today to wish me whole heartedly for my future. This is not the end of life .Life has it's own hard turns and when turn comes one needs to think about many things and have to control emmotions, this is acting like a meatured girl i did that .

what a life a girl leads .................

How simple my life is now you are within me now,
How I cherish each breath,
How I crave the light and laughter you have brought me.
I have fallen in love without taking a step,
Fallen into the sweetest of dreams,
How I hope no one wakes me.
The simplest gesture wraps itself around my heart,
Where I will hold it forever.

Each time we say goodby a part of me weeps,
Though I know it is not forever
To my aching soul it is an eternity.
I see my happiness shine in your heart,
Every time you had smile for me my heart skips a beat.
How sweet life is to be yours;
How meaningless life is without you.

They know nothing of the loneliness before you
Nothing of the empty tears I cried day after day,
How did you do it, I ask myself,
How did you banish the fear, the darkness?
You have made me see that nothing is that bad,
That I am strong and worthy of happiness,
You have to save me from my fear and unanswered questtions
which are becoming more painful for me.

Everyday I wake up and smile to myself
Knowing you are waiting for me,
Knowing you can't wait to see me.
How would I go on if you were not there to hold me up,
To bless me with your love and light?
How I am glad you have found me
My life is now complete...
whenI am with you in my sweet home.

what do you think a girls life should be..? How does she need to live does she need to control her feelings and supress in her heart
OR
she has to spell out to the person and confess in front of him that she can not live with out him

Girl:One day a girl was in her office suddenly she had somebody who just said a hi to her in her messenger she replied back saying hi and the girl was very open to tell ask it went on
Girl: The second day the girl saw the same person online said hi again and they have shifted to another messenger had a long chat in that somewhere
Guy:The guy had asked the girl about her surname .
Girl:The girl got so exited the guy and asks the guy to call her on her official mobile
Guy:he calls her in a scared tone says hi to her
Girl :she kept on asking him why are you so scared about me..?
Guy:No iam new to you no i might take some time to come out and talk to you properly but the guy kept on telling the girl that i do speak a lot
Girl: On the third day girl calls up the guy in the afternoon to ask why you are not online
she was expecting this guy to come online
Guy: replies to her saying iam busy with my work and mail me i will reply you back
Girl: Finishes her work goes back home lies down on bed got disturbed by another person this was the girls friend and roomamate. Girl tells roommate that i need to make a call.The roommate walks out of the room thinking of giving privacy to this girl and the girl locks
the door and calls up the guyon his land line she talks but she founds out something is wrong
Guy:he says to the girl that i can not give you the friendship you want to...
Girl:she thinks a lot about it decides to call at 1:00Am she convinces him till 4:00AM and meanwhile she comes accross a simmillar incidence which had happend to the guy and she tries convincing him
Girls:she starts fourth day day was good it was raining and she stands at the window in the morning and sees something was troubling her and she tried to find out but it was getting late for her to go to office she decides to think about it later . the day starts and she phases many hurdles she writes blogs also but she was still under tention the same situation expecting guy to come online
Guy: replied her mail saying that iam available in such number and call mean while the girl decides not to call up the guy for some reason she still calls up him but could not talk anything .He understands her situation in a friendly way he asks what is troubling you tell me she denies to tell him and writes to him saying i donot want to talk to you ans i want to stay away from you
Girl: goes back home late night and takes shower takes her dinner usual things she does and she goes back to sleep suddenly she realizes she is not getting sleep and she is crying with out anyreason .She decides to call up the guy
Guy: replies to her in soft way he understood her she confesses herself to him and says i can not live with out you ..
Guy: he believs the girl and decides the same

will both of them could lead a happy life there are 101 obstrucles for them ... But still both of them trust each other and decides many things in life will they have a happy life ahead ...let us join our hands to pray for both of them they have never seen each other never met each other but still feel they can not live with out each other .......let us all hope and wish them all the best for their future ...

How does a Girls life pass .....?

When you were in mom's woomb we had spelt out when we wanted something and when we came in to this world we had always one person who was there with you to share your feelings and she could really understand what you wanted she gave everything possible to you.

Now you are not with her anymore she is very far form you and you have share your feelings .....

when really saw time has passed away and time has come where this poor girl has to understand someone elses felling and supply all that some one else needs ...

thats how girls life passes ........

when ever we hear what heart says where we will land up?
when we listen to mind where we will land up ?
when will we listen to heart and mind combindly ........?
when.....................................................................................?

for a girl from the age of 12 years had so many crushes and she used to think it was a crime having feelings for someone .

when she was in the age of 18 what she did she started seeing many girls having guys besides them and getting so many letters and stuff.

when she was 20 she has got an opportunity to get an proposal from a boy by then she was tired in life she thought she donot have a place for a guy ...

when she was 21 Again another chance came to her door steps but she refused for a reason .In the same year another chance came she refused that too.

when she was 23 years old she had a same feeling as she used to have in teen age she thought it would never happend but because of her friend she has spelled it out and she had to phase a negative answer which was horrible she took lots of time to come out the whole situation ...

Now she is having the same situations like before how to deal with it ......... which is a big question mark ?

she has no answer to many questions ?

will it remain as a question always ?

what is this ?

she is unable to analyse anything whom to blame for this ......? Tears are left for her ......
hope and pray she would have great feelings and have a wonderful person in life who was made for her ...

let us all pray for this girl so that she finds solutions ................................

when does one realize mistakes when does that time come .I had situations because of my friends i have realised certain things that i was wrong in doing this and that ..

But one thing is true that right and wrong no one can decide and we can not Judge we all know GOD is there to judge each one of us and he will judge . But why do we become judgemental all the time . I was thinking about my own incidnces .

I had a situation last to last night it was silly but i became judgemental about issue myself and decided not to be many a times i feel iam not correct many a times and when ever i was wrong i was guilty about the things but did not ask for apologies because of many reasons .I feel we have every right to choose to be friendly with people all the time we can not say why you want to be friendly and why you donot want to be ...

We are not perfect but in our own way we feel we are the best but there is always space for correcting ourselves i would thank many for manking me realize my mistakes those were my best friends ... I hope i would be a good individual if not perfect ........

Some of My Experiences

Are we able to differentiate between wants and needs ... what are our wants and needs ? When day starts we plan things but when things won't go accordingly then we blame others blame GOD many times but one things we all know : when we plan GOD sits and laughs at us.

I wanted to know myself what are my wants and needs many a times i cold not find out my needs and wants i did many things and later when i think i was really blank did not knew what to do in life we all have needs and wants we want to see ourselves somewhere one day . Pray GOD would help each one of us to satisfy our wants and needs .

I was thinking about myself when i started life in Bangladesh the start was bad because first day that is on 28th march 2005 when i landed in ZIA INTERNATIONAL AIRPORT it is the international airport of Dhaka bangaldesh the welcome was good then we came met our boss with the tired faces and showed one hostel where there were all girls and no privacy few bathrooms which were kept unclean did not knew what to do blamed myself why did i come and all and next day was to start work and office whole day worked in setting my office and that was horrible i brought my chairs and took 10 days to set the office

I had a class mate with me all these days with me on second day was hospital inaguration Bangladesh primeminister was here for security reasons they have closed all the doors and lifts were stopped did not knew what to do from 9th level i started shouting language problem finally one security person on groud floor heard me and came to us and landed on ground floor the day was bad people were busy in their own work did not knew CEO said a hi to us we both sat for few hours and started walking inside and security fellow had stopped us going inside that was the third day and the journey went on now it is six months since iam here .

Met online friends i call them very often had a situation where one person asked me why do you make calls to chat friends and whole day spent in analysing what are my needs and wants there was no answer hope i would get to learn more things there were situations i shouted at people because they were talking in a language which i could not understand now iam in a position to understand life started in Bangladesh intial start was bad and i donot know when the day will come when i can see my loved once that is a need now .....there are many wants and needs which i did not tell you ....but i found after six months of boaring life in Bangladesh ....